hye all…it’s been quite sumtimes since i haven’t write anything in my own world of thoughts…yeahh,been so busy lately with many important things n so important things in my life….but, i do survive n still surviving…hopefully i can make it through the rain….lalalala….hehehe…by mariah carey….
well, it’s almost 3 months from now for me to be at QUT….so eager to get there yet so sad to leave my hometown n my loved ones n my room n my friends n my everything…i still feel not ready to face new challenges and perhaps new life overthere…but with God’s will, i believe He will help me and guide me from doing anything bad or wrong when i’m at Brisbane…
*****for my close friends, im sory to keep this behind ur back….n keep denied it everytime u guys ask me*****
why my title for this time is it’s so complicated…well,i also dunno y i wrote dat….but, i think it’s the most approriate sentence for rite now….actually, i have played sumone’s heart which it’s unintentionally to do that and with no good reason i keep continue to do it…all times….he’s been my friend for 4 months now…mind u that we haven’t met but he already seen my pictures but i haven’t..not fair, rite??..n for the past 2 weeks, he has proposed me to be his gf…for abt 5 times now…and last nite, he couldn’t take it no more n asked me to stop hurting him….he did understand that my priority is study but he wants me to hv relationship with him….which i dun actually want it at the first place…but i dun want to let him go…as he is so good…n perfect to be a husband…btw, he’s 25…im confused whether to accept him or not…but seriously i dun want him to out of my life…n i really want him to be with me…for the rest of my life…OH GOD…I THINK IM IN LOVE….
but, what if sumthing happens when we are apart from each other…for 2 years…what if i found sumbody else and he still waiting for me..what if he found another gurl n i still wanting him…what if we both dun have the agreement to be together?…what if everything that happens rite now is only a mistake…n hurts both of us??..what if i couldn’t accept and also does he….what if that…what if this…all these questions keep repeating in my mind and do influence my considerations to accept him…n the big question is…will my parent n family accept him??…will his parent n family allow me to enter their circle??…hmmmm…..
therefore, i ask him to give me 2 weeks to settle everything and i think im ready to face the consequences…perhaps, it might hurt both of us…esp him since he love me soooo muchhh….n…i dun know….
pls,who ever read this, decide for me…should i n shouldn’t i accept his proposal….
thanks….n till here…bubbye
